8.5 more months before I leave this place.
For a moment I really thought I was going crazy. I do feel bad when I complain about this place and even the people because really, not all of them are like that. And also that I feel like I'm indirectly insulting people here because this is where they call home. Sometimes I just feel so suffocated I need to let it out but I know that shouldn't be an excuse to be insensitive towards others, so I'm sorry.
Anyway, yes, 8.5 more months. I don't know if I can pull through this without trying to strangle myself with the tie or drowning myself during shower but I hope this journey will be smooth-sailing and worth it. Just let it be worth my time, that's all I ask for.
Sometimes I get confused as to where I should call 'home'. I came here when I was 4. To be honest, I cannot remember well the things that happened there. I watched tapes of me when I was younger though, I think that reminded me of how my house used to look like and how life there was like. I always say I like it there and also the people there, but sometimes I get so mixed up because do I really know what it is like to be living there? I don't know. Maybe it's only a temporary shelter, a place to protect me from all the problems I face here. Maybe I only want a place where nobody knows my name and I can start anew.
I don't feel like I belong anywhere.
I just want to feel like I belong somewhere.
